Cowboys and Aliens

The picture says it all: The lady on the left is an alien in human form. The guy in the middle wears an alien wrist band that shoots special beams, but he's not an alien. The guy on the right? Just Harrison Ford being Harrison Ford!

I dig tongue-in-cheek flicks. I can even dig really over-the-top creative films. I can only dig a hole for this loser and take the entire reel and toss it away!

The premise: Back in the days of the west, say the late 1800's, an alien craft lands and sends out little predators that look, well, surprisingly like the little alien predators of nearly every sci fi movie. So we have cowboys, that is, bad dudes, mostly, fighting folks from outer space. Gee, what 's wrong with this picture?

Not sure why this film does not work. Could it be the lousy acting? Lousy script? Lousy plot? I want to be more articulate, but sometimes films just don't do what they're supposed to!

Good points? Nice action shots. Nice scenery. Nice computer graphics of aliens.

I'd avoid this mish-mosh of a flick: It's neither a solid western nor a solid sci-fi piece. It's....uh...well...cowboys and aliens!

Bummer!

Upcoming films for Valerie

So, these are a few I plan to see. How about you?

• Exceptionally Loud and Incredibly Close - LOVED the book. Trailer tugs at my emotions already. Hope it's a worthy translation.

• The Descendants Don't worry, David; I have never pined for G. Clooney. Just find him adorable - gay, straight (yea, right), whatever!

Sherlock Holmes

Loved the first one. Loved this one. SOOO clever, engaging. This one a bit darker. Go see it, then we'll talk.

We Bought a Zoo

[This blogster has decided that, for awhile, I'll just post a recommendation - or not - of movies I see, with the hopes that another will also and weigh in as discussion. So my posts shall stay quite brief.]

Matt Damon is in the very small, elite group of actors whose work I will always go see. But it is possible for Matt Damon to make a bleh movie. It is also possible to director, Cameron Crowe.

We Bought a Zoo. Good for you. No drama. No romance. No innovation. Everyone called it in.

Wanted to like it. Bored. Sigh.

Jason Bourne, I need you!

Eating Raoul

Back in 1984, a wonderful film came out that I sadly missed. It's called Eating Raoul. Oh my, what a fun tongue-in-cheek comedy!

What's it about? Well, the picture says it all: A very odd couple find themselves in need of money....so they use that little frying pan to bonk folks on the head, kill them dead (rhyme intended), and take off with their money!

In the style of grand farce, the film deftly maintains a tone of sobriety. The main characters never once appear less than earnest in their merry quest for bodies and money!

A third character, Raoul, provides extra spice to the plotline. He likes the pretty spouse and they do, well, something unusual. Now who will kill whom? Who is "good"? Anyone? Haha.

Great romp if you're in the mood for light fare. By the way, note the pun on "light fare."

Bon appetit!

PS: NOT gruesome like Sweeney Todd. NOT humans with fava beans either.

Warhorse

If you look far and wide at this reviewer's comments on this site, you'll note that he rarely pans a film. I tend to be quite positive, seeing the good in most films, if at all possible. Gotta really stretch to say anything laudatory about this dog (horse?) of a film!

Guess my dear spouse and I were fooled by the hype. See the yellow headline in the picture above? Yeah, it's a Spielberg production. So stupid us, thinking, well, if it's Spielberg, it must be good, run out and see the Warhorse! We left about 5/6 of the way through the film.

What's the film about? No spoiler, of course. It's a two part deal: In the first two thirds of the film, the story is about a boy and his horse (see the pic above?). A boy and his horse? Isn't that sort of a kids' theme? PRECISELY! See, the boy lives on a farm and he loves his horse, and only he can make the wild thing obey. They make eyes at each other, that horse and boy, for at least an hour and a quarter.

Then, when you think you can't take another minute of this maudlin, soapy, unctuous plot, there is a shift in the story: Suddenly, the horse is off in the middle of WWI! Poor horse! Suffering amidst human misery. OH: Don't let the kids see this part...it's gory, gritty, violent, and, well, meaningless.

Guess it's all a question of honesty in advertising. This film should have been touted as follows: Take the kids to a boy-and-his-horse story, but leave before the violence starts!

Haha!

Oh, Steven, you can do so much better! I remember ET, and Jaws, and Schindler's List, and so many other masterpieces.

Will the real Spielberg please stand up?

OK, one redeeming value: There are wonderful outdoor panoramas of landscapes. Yeah, the camera work is good.

Grade of D-.... Don't go near this loser of a flick!

The Artist

Berenice Bejo, the star shown above, is the standout in this very unusual, and very laudable, film. She charms her way into the viewer's heart. She even tap dances like a pro. I'm guessing we'll be seeing a lot more of her. The French love their cutesy actress, witness Catherine Deneuve, Emmanuelle Bejart, and Audrey Tautou.

What's the film about? Essentially, it's a silent that pays homage to the old silent films of the 1920's. Personally, I've never been a fan of silents. I've found the big eyes and exaggerated grimaces way too annoying to get into the genre. Fellow film critics tend to laud the old Chaplin films: I have never seen one in its entirety.

So, given this basic dislike of the silents, it would take quite an amazing silent film to please me. And please me The Artist does! Wow! What a wonderful piece of filmmaking! Of course, with 21st Century 20/20 hindsight, it's not too hard to improve on the original genre. And it does not hurt to have modern cameras "create" the old effect.

The storyline is simple, and I can mention it without giving away anything of substance: An idol in his late 30's, who resembles Douglas Fairbanks to a T, is a great star of the 20's. Will he continue his success in the 30's? A young fan, pretty, delightful, Berenice Bejo, enters Hollywood in a most unlikely way by his side. The two fall in love. Can their love sustain the ups and downs of Hollywood?

There's more, of course, but I won't be a spoiler.

I would divide the film into two parts. The first part is so charming and witty that you wonder if you've ever seen a more adorable, upbeat film. Part two is more dour, quite long, and sort of spoils the mood of the first half.

Overall, what an original, heartwarming piece of filmmaking!

Grade of A+++! RUN out and see this one!